I feel like a lot of millennials are “hopeless romantics” just waiting on love. Most of us get discouraged when we are steadily meeting people who just aren’t the one. After a while, it gets tiring reintroducing yourself to people that could potentially be the “one”. You spend countless time, money and energy on people to find out that they aren’t even close to worth it. What needs to be a reminder to this generation is patience. You ever think it’s not working because you simply are not ready?A lot of people seem to have it “together” but really are lacking in areas that God needs you to recognize. I’ve been in relationships where I wanted it to work so bad I unknowingly forced it. It was time to let it go and I would hang on tighter. I was incomplete, I had issues I needed to work on, and there was a lack of self-love I didn’t recognize until years later. I feel like most of us get so upset when someone leaves us, or a relationship breaks off… I’m here to tell you don’t be, celebrate that shit. THEY WEREN’T IT IN THE FIRST PLACE. If somebody is really for you, the universe will let you know, you won’t be confused, you won’t be unhappy and you damn sure won’t be hurting.
The bad relationships you have experienced were learning experiences, not mistakes, remember that. Every single person you meet holds a purpose in your life, in some way shape or form, whether you realize it or not. Personally, my past relationships made me STRONGER, the lies, the cheating, and disrespect etc made me realize who the fuck I really am. So for my next relationship, my whole approach is DIFFERENT. Keep in mind whatever storm you are going through is preparation for the next chapter in your life. Unfortunately, you had to endure that pain to wake up and to recognize your worth. You were getting the signs but were probably ignoring them… Don’t do that again.
After a while, I started to think I liked toxicity. As much as I tried to avoid it, I still was found wrapped up in it. I realized I kept connecting with people that were like me, broken and damaged. Now, for someone that is broken and or damaged it is very unhealthy for you to begin relations with someone that is also the same. Try to “make it work” and it won’t, you’ll just be wasting time. Both parties need to work on self BEFORE entering the relationship. This goes for people who are not “broken/ damaged” as well. Maybe you just need to get your shit together. The focus is school, your career, THIS BAG, and working on self-love but YET, your chasing a companion. Your life isn’t even intact, and you don’t even know how to properly love others because you have not loved yourself first.
Some might be afraid to be alone for too long, but I say embrace it, enjoy it. Definitely, go socialize every now and again but DO NOT be afraid to be by yourself. I used to be the type of person that felt like I always needed somebody and it was wrong if I wasn’t around somebody… That idea is so false and should not be looked down upon. It’s absolutely ok to be in your own space absorbing your own energy. If you haven’t been in a relationship for a while take that time to get to know YOU better, know your want’s and needs by what the last person failed to give you, and continue loving yo self. Don’t be mad it ended, for whatever reason, IT IS NOT YOUR TIME. If you keep AVOIDING self-love, the universe will keep sending you people who avoid LOVING YOU, it’s no way around it.
What is self-love you say?
Self-love is the act of loving everything about you, knowing your worth and consciously aware of your well being AND happiness. Before fully committing to someone else, fully commit to YOU. Get yourself prepared for the love of your life, not a one night stand…
While you are single and playing the “waiting game” take ALL the time you need to get mentally, spiritually and emotionally correct. Them goals you got, that vision you have to make ALL that happen! Don’t delay your greatness on the account of someone else, YOU come first! You are entirely capable of whatever you dream of, just give it life. God gave you all the tools you needed, you just need to dig deeper…
When you’re ready, to receive it, God will give it to you. Stay patient, work on you and trust the process. If you gonna take an L, let it be a lesson, not a loss. Stay focused and remain SELFISH in 2018, this is the year of the CHAMPS.